The Pilgrimage Factor
I wanted deeper. I needed deeper.
This introduction to Mike Bickel happened around the time when we heard that the police were about to make an arrest and charge a man with the first degree murder of our daughter.
Even though we appreciated the efforts of the police to solve the case, I was distraught with this news. I wanted the issues solved and put to rest, just like everyone else, but I was worried about the process.
As I said before – we had normalized by this time. Our children were adults and proving themselves to be very wonderful and responsible people. We had moved into a new house, to a different part of the city. Cliff and I were settled into new jobs. We didn't need any more trauma. I didn't want anything to disrupt our lives once again - not even the hope of justice.
Actually, I had heard too many horror stories of the system. I had seen one couple whose daughter had been murdered grieve as to be expected. They were coming to terms with it, when a year later their case was brought to trial. That's when they changed from being normal grieving parents to this angry, revengeful, justice-seeking couple - as the justice system failed them again and again.
To tell the truth, I hadn’t seen or met one victim of a violent crime who had been satisfied with the justice system or gained from it. It was always a defeat somehow.
Even in our case, an officer, upon hearing that we tended to forgive, had just grinned, "Just wait till they catch the guy – and you’re heading into trial. Then you won’t be be as forgiving."
My experience told me that there is something very revictimizing and insulting about the system….
I think the entire family was infected with my fear and dread of the process, so we were all out "looking for new courage and solutions."
This Bickle was promising something more so Cliff and I went down to Kansas City just to check him out - to experience his program first hand.
I wouldn't say that we became avid - blinded - Mike Bickle followers – not anymore than I would say that we have been a follower of any one of the great ministers we had heard and followed over the years, Gerry Michalski, Paul Wartman, Allan Labun, John Epp, and the list goes on.
However we were intrigued with Bickle's Kansas city organization that had run a 24/7 prayer ministry for almost 20 years. We enjoyed their accomplished and creative worship bands called, "harp and bowl." And when our children booked us into their prophetic rooms – we found the prophetic words calming, healing, relevant and vibrant.
It took three years for the case to actually get to trial. The wait was torturous.
So two weeks before the first trial, we as a family, once again all headed down to Kansas City for the "One thing Conference" - a refresher course on going deeper.
It was a desperate time for us....
We were on a quest…..
“It is a commonplace of all religious thought, even the most primitive, that the man seeking visions and insight must go apart from his fellows and love for a time in the wilderness. – Loren Eiseley
This introduction to Mike Bickel happened around the time when we heard that the police were about to make an arrest and charge a man with the first degree murder of our daughter.
Even though we appreciated the efforts of the police to solve the case, I was distraught with this news. I wanted the issues solved and put to rest, just like everyone else, but I was worried about the process.
As I said before – we had normalized by this time. Our children were adults and proving themselves to be very wonderful and responsible people. We had moved into a new house, to a different part of the city. Cliff and I were settled into new jobs. We didn't need any more trauma. I didn't want anything to disrupt our lives once again - not even the hope of justice.
Actually, I had heard too many horror stories of the system. I had seen one couple whose daughter had been murdered grieve as to be expected. They were coming to terms with it, when a year later their case was brought to trial. That's when they changed from being normal grieving parents to this angry, revengeful, justice-seeking couple - as the justice system failed them again and again.
To tell the truth, I hadn’t seen or met one victim of a violent crime who had been satisfied with the justice system or gained from it. It was always a defeat somehow.
Even in our case, an officer, upon hearing that we tended to forgive, had just grinned, "Just wait till they catch the guy – and you’re heading into trial. Then you won’t be be as forgiving."
My experience told me that there is something very revictimizing and insulting about the system….
I think the entire family was infected with my fear and dread of the process, so we were all out "looking for new courage and solutions."
This Bickle was promising something more so Cliff and I went down to Kansas City just to check him out - to experience his program first hand.
I wouldn't say that we became avid - blinded - Mike Bickle followers – not anymore than I would say that we have been a follower of any one of the great ministers we had heard and followed over the years, Gerry Michalski, Paul Wartman, Allan Labun, John Epp, and the list goes on.
However we were intrigued with Bickle's Kansas city organization that had run a 24/7 prayer ministry for almost 20 years. We enjoyed their accomplished and creative worship bands called, "harp and bowl." And when our children booked us into their prophetic rooms – we found the prophetic words calming, healing, relevant and vibrant.
It took three years for the case to actually get to trial. The wait was torturous.
So two weeks before the first trial, we as a family, once again all headed down to Kansas City for the "One thing Conference" - a refresher course on going deeper.
It was a desperate time for us....
We were on a quest…..
“It is a commonplace of all religious thought, even the most primitive, that the man seeking visions and insight must go apart from his fellows and love for a time in the wilderness. – Loren Eiseley
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